01 November, 2012

On depression

Why do people get depressed? I often am asking myself this question.  There is no right answer to this question .

The most common answer you would get  is that it is due to circumstances. It varies from different person to person.

Depression is often a result of the fear of failure. Failure in relationships, in professional life and at times in the personal life. This again is dependent on the time of this.

Often people go into a delusion that they are not wanted.  The entire world is against them.  Nothing that the person does is appreciated.  With every small allegations and misunderstandings the situation worsens.

How does one deal with it?  Often people resort to smoking and binge drinking or run away to be left alone.  The company of others feels a burden and a state of having to laugh alongside others when one does not want to.

Is it really possible to be one own self when depression hits? Do you still continue to live in  an utopian state of mind or does something change? What is that thing.?

The next point of course is to know whether there is a way out of this state.  And if you do, do you come out as a different person?  Someone who is motivated to not let depression strike again;  or  do you become more vulnerable to it.

There are so many questions. Life is full of these questions. Many to which we do not have an answer.

Facing Death

Facing death. It is a moment that you do not forget for a long time.  Today was one such I day.
Today whole driving In my car,  I was hit by a bus . For an instance i thought this was it.  Perhaps the last few moments of my life.  It was for those few seconds that I was too shocked. Anything could have happened.  I had my life play out in front of me.

While driving I was thinking about the one thing that is dearest to me right now; my wife.  Had she eaten anything ? What should I buy for the evening. Perhaps I will cook dinner today since she will get home late.  Where should we go for our second anniversary etc.

I was to occupied in these thoughts when a bus decided to take a sudden cut and bang into my car. Today the car completes one month and I was also thinking about the pleasant moments I have had with it so far.

Today suddenly I felt scared of death.  I Had not felt the same even while doing stunts liked sky diving.  They say that death is the only thing that is certain . The same thing cannot be said for anything else.  Perhaps if is these moments that make you realistic and realize the value of life.   It makes you appreciated the people you love all the more.  it makes you feel worried about what will happen to them when you are gone.

In an ideal relationship, Unconditional love flows. The kind of love you love without expecting anything in return for it. Though it is very idealistic thing  as there  are bound to be differences. Yet we as humans strive for it.  We run around really hard to ensure that the relationship is not hampered by these differences.

In moments like the one that happened today,  you forget that you expect a similar sense of unconditional love, that is pure.  you just want to live to love.  Where you're only worry is the person you love.